…and I feel like the poster child for those who should “take the time to heal right, but can’t because life would fall apart if you did.” WARNING: This post is about women problems (menstruation).
I’ve been pretty vocal about wanting more kids, and the steps I was willing to take to have them. After my cycle ran amuck and I thought I was dying from blood loss, and with no end in sight, I had an endometrial ablation. A minor-ish procedure. I was down for the next 2 days from cramping, but no more periods, right? I was told that by the 3 month post-op date, I would know if it worked or not. 6 days shy of the 3 month mark, with no warning at all, the flood gates opened! I was devastated. My period was back and just as heavy as before. Since it started I was running for the bathroom every hour, and then every time I stood up, sat down, or adjusted my position in any way. I couldn’t be more than a few steps from the bathroom at any time. By day 2 my head hurt so bad and I had already bled through a giant pad, underwear, and night shirt, and was actively bleeding on the bathroom floor.
I wasn’t going back to the ER because I did that once before I had the ablation and all they did was put an IV below my thumb (which hurt like hell) that they took blood from but didn’t give me fluids, they gave me Benadryl to help me sleep (because clearly I would want to sleep knowing I would bleed all over), told me I was fine sand sent me home. And that was after 8 straight weeks of nonstop, heavy bleeding. I decided to call my obgyn and talk to a nurse, maybe she had suggestions or whatever. I talked to the nurse who told me I needed a CBC with differential and suggested I go to the ER or urgent care to get it. Screw that, I have connections (not many, but I have some). I called someone who ordered them without having to resort to a trip to the ER or urgent care. I made an appointment with the obgyn, and went to the lab to get the tests done.
Fast forward 4 days and I’m sitting in the obgyn’s office. Still bleeding very heavy. He came in and asked what I wanted to do. I told him I just want it to stop, whatever it takes. I couldn’t work a full shift, and couldn’t do my job effectively while I was there, I couldn’t take care of my family, I was miserable. He said I could wait it out and see how it plays out or I could have a hysterectomy. Either way I’d be missing more work, and the only way I could stop it for sure was to pick the hysterectomy. So we scheduled it for 6 days later to give me a chance to get things in order because I wouldn’t be able to anything for the first week, and not much more for the second. I would need to plan on taking 4-6 weeks off work.
Surgery was a week ago yesterday. I had a laparoscopic assisted partial hysterectomy. They took my uterus, cervix, and fallopian tubes, which were sent to pathology to try to determine the cause of the excessive bleeding and to make sure there’s nothing hereditary that my girls need to worry about. (We’re still waiting on the results). They left my ovaries. So any chance I might get cervical or uterine cancer were completely wiped out, and my chance of getting ovarian cancer was cut in half and I wouldn’t have to take hormones. On strong pain meds and ibuprofen, I was in bed for 5 days only getting up to go the bathroom. I had alarms set every 4 hours to help me manage the pain. On day 6 I was going crazy and had to get out of the house. Thank goodness for the scooter carts at Walmart. I got shopping done and got out of the house for a couple hours. I got home and was sore and exhausted.
Day 7 my sister-in-law and 2 of my nephews were passing through town on their way home and stopped to visit. It was so great to see them. They brought me flowers and stayed for a little while. Day eight, R had therapy, so Jay came and picked us up and drove us to the therapist. We went to Del Taco for dinner afterwards, and by the time we got home I was tired and hurting. Today, I’m staying in the house and staying in bed as long as the kids will let me. I’m down to only taking half a pain killer a couple times a day, and using over the counter pain relievers to manage the pain. It hurts a lot, but the pain is keeping me from overdoing it too much.
I hate not being able to do more, but I don’t want to be in pain for the rest of my life because I didn’t take the time to allow myself to heal. I think that Jay and J are both finally beginning to understand how much I do for our family. With them having to step in and step up to make sure everything doesn’t fall apart, I’d like to think they will continue to help even after I’m healed. I’d like to, but I don’t. I don’t think R really grasps everything that going on, so I think he’s largely unaffected by all of the changes.
As much as I complain and vent about my family, they’ve really stepped up and I’m very proud of them. I have another 3-5 weeks before I can go back to work, and I’m going to try to make the best of it, and not over do it too much. I’m happy I had the surgery, and I’m happy I will never have another period. I’m a little sad that I will never be pregnant again, but I think I actually came to terms with that long before I had the ablation done.